Black As My Soul: Do You Understand What You Are Asking of Me?

April 20, 2003

Is it fucking funny? Where the hell would this lead?

Do you understand what you are asking of me?

How could this be good?

Do you understand how much I want you?

Can you even fathom what this is like?

I fantasize about it working.

I imagine it failing.

It would be based at the outset on a breach of trust.

Do you get that?

What would it mean to you if you convinced me to go through with it?

See, I'm already convinced. I'm just waiting for an excuse.

I would just be another asshole, wouldn't I?

Or am I somehow different in your mind?

In the end, I would just be another asshole.

How could I look at you if I couldn't trust myself?

I want what I think you have. Maybe you want what you think I have.

This is killing me.

I could justify it under one circumstance alone. One.

How could I find that out before I fuck things up?

I just don't want to put a pistol to my temple.

I really want a chance at the one thing. I really want that.

Is that so wrong?

Is that so fucking wrong?

[+] Posted by Soulless S. Breedlove at April 20, 2003 10:39 PM, who was sinning at the time by revealing evil. [+]