September 2006 Archives

:: sigh ::

So I took the day off without pay Friday. I went to court at my appointed time of 8:30 and I think it was more than 2 hours after that before I could even speak with the prosecutor.

I chose to resolve the issue that day. I could have chosen to have a trial but I didn't feel like it was appropriate.

Here's the chain of events:

In January I got stopped for speeding. 74 in a 55. During that period, I was selling possessions to make rent, so I put off paying the fine.

In March, because I didn't pay the fine, my license was suspended.

In June, I was stopped for speeding again. 40 in a 30 zone. The officer did me a favor that night. He only cited me for speeding and driving on a suspended license. He could have impounded my car, but he didn't. He believed me when I told him I was broke. But he noted things like my Cadillac, my Treo, and my iPod and scolded me. I felt shamed.

In August, I finally managed to pay the second speeding ticket. I did not appear in court, although technically I should have. Because my fine was paid, they charged me about $85 for not appearing but took no additional action against me. They could have and rightly. I didn't realize how critical it was that I appeared. Nor did I realize the seriousness of being caught without a valid license.

At the beginning of September, I was stopped a third time. As I posted previously, it was only because the officer chose to run my plate. I don't know why. But it came back to him showing the owner had a suspended license. So he stopped me.

This resulted in my car being impounded and a court summons—that I satisfied Friday.

I guess if there is a moral to this story, it is "Pay your fines." Or maybe "Obey the God-damned traffic laws." Or, at the least, "Don't try this at home."

Because all of my bravado of late about obeying the speed limits to the letter didn't mean a thing.

And let's face it, big brother is paying attention.

But, oh! Yeah…

The hearing.

I plead guilty. After getting stopped a second time, I didn't feel I could convincingly lie about not knowing my license was suspended.

No discount then on the fine. I paid the full $300 for a misdemeanor, plus an additional $75 fee. Prior to Friday, I was not aware the court room is a fine revenue-enhancement tool. Thousands were collected in the short time I was in the room.

I was also sentenced to 30 days in the "work house." That was stayed for a year—of probation. Unless I am charged with any "same or similar" offense.

So… I can drive today. But shortly I will get a letter detailing for how long I cannot drive.

On the plus side… public transportation is just fine. My iPod and sleep are my friends.

I wear a ring with pentacles all around it. The point at the top of the star is inverted in every other instance. No matter which way I wear it or which angle it is viewed from, you can see what you want to see. Black or white. Sacred or profane. I love this.

It's an old, old symbol. We've been told in the 20th century that it represents black magic and Satan. It's marketed to us in religious indoctrination and horror films. In the 19th century the inverted pentagram represented Christ in his mission on earth, and was a symbol used in and on Christian sanctuaries. Astronomical lore shows this is the figure traced in the sky by the planet Venus if you look at its position in the sky once every 484 days.

Lately I've been interested in cycles, and the power that is inherent in the keeping of time.

And I feel like I'm on to something.

Forgive the play on words! ;)

A while back, perhaps even years ago, I started to see the figures and depictions of the Virgin Mary in terms of a resemblance to female anatomy, specifically the vulva and the folds of the labia.

This has a lot to do with the significant amounts of porn stills that I have downloaded or otherwise have viewed and or consumed. I have seen a lot of vulva. Frankly, this is why I look at porn. I desire views of vulva.

Nevertheless, I would swear that I posted to this blog along those same lines. I can't prove it though. No amount of searching I've done with words like virgin, Mary, vulva and labia has produced even the briefest post with this subject matter on this blog. Google indicates that I am not alone in these thoughts, and Fleshbot have linked to a site with some spectacular exaples of exactly what I was thinking.

I give you: The Yoniverse's Madonna Code Revealed

I subcribed to their feed, recently.

I had known of them for a long time. It used to be more purely links to porn and babe galleries, and I used them heavily for that.

Now it seems to be a more all purpose blog for all things sexual—with reporting and editorial by Violet Blue and Audacia Ray.

But this is good. And my links have recently grown because of sites they have mentioned.

"But we don't know where
And we don't know
Where"

-Simon and Garfunkel
"The Only Living Boy In New York"

Fuck, man.

This has been the year of eeking by.

I owe money to family and friends. And creditors.

But today I had to go further into the red again.

Little speeding ticket I put off paying — you know, because I need to have a place to sleep and food to eat. I'm kind of a diva that way…

I mean, it's not as bad as all that, but it has been really tough for me personally this year. I've had to sell possesions to make rent a few times. It has been really humbling. Lots of other problems mean nothing when it's not clear if rent will be there or not.

And I'm not stupid. I get that this is all fallout from decisions made and actions taken or not taken. Opportunities squandered.

And I'm trying really, really hard to be a hell of a lot more grateful for what I have. I'm serious.

But fuck. I didn't even do anything visibly wrong and a nice officer ran my plates to find the owner, me, had a suspended license.

So he pulled me over and towed my car. Like he's supposed to. I know. I shouldn't have been driving. I knew my license was suspended. But I thought if I was a good boy and obeyed all traffic laws up to and including every posted speed limit… Yeah. *Nope.* They have really fucking sophisticated PC terminals now. If I had one of those there would be no end to the mobile porn I would be viewing. So it's nothing to run a plate or a license. I saw it with my own eyes.

Today I scambled. Had to get money and a pair of people to get me to the police station so I could prove ownership and insurance, then over to the towing company. Because any day I delayed was an extra $25 on the tab. I had a two hour window today in which to extricate my beloved Deville.

So I'm finding two things. Despite the fact that it was actually a cheap used car… no financial sympathy for Cadillac owners. And? What kind of person drives a Gold Cadillac? Apparently, It's not your Elvis' Cadillac anymore. ;)

I just wanted to rant.

So I have my car safely in the drive and I'm not doing anything else today. Fuck it.

I'm drinking my Newcastles while my baby watches the game.